+1 for your Stargate reference.

I think the best Star Wars tech would be teleporters, you know, just like Kirk and Picard used to get places.

He was only down there for a few seconds, but his recording device recorded 18 hours of static.

JuJu is the best kind of nerd. 

You know, Jeff Sessions may want to check out the other references to immigrants in the Bible. I seem to recall one or two...

I said, ‘Tristan, we ain’t cut the same’

These are the 33 Democrats who probably think Lucy will let Charlie Brown finally kick that football too.

That is an excellent point. Going into this game I’m sure the New England Patriots were going to give it maybe 75%. I mean there’s a lot of pressure to win, and Belichick runs a pretty tight ship, but it gets cold sometimes and it’s late in the year, and I would be willing to bet they just aren’t properly motivated.

Yup, used to be an alcoholic (still am, albeit a non-drinking one). Got help from a medical institute (NOT the AA), slowly cut back with help, am still clean and only rarely have a craving (at which point i make myself some tea).

If it is a physical addiction it is extremely dangerous to quit cold turkey. Please don’t to suddenly quit if you are a heavy drinker, seek medical advice first.

This is one profoundly moronic take.

“Man, he really made that W disappear. It’s good to know someone who can dispose of things that quickly.”

They could rebrand it as Sansparent

The flop by James Rodriguez was pretty bad too.

No no. No jokes when someone might lose a leg. Go to the corner for a timeout

I saw the GIF before the title, and just assumed this was Wondowlowski.

Look at this. Look. At. It.

the nut on the bus goes pound pound pound

😂😂 That’s hilarious. It reminded me of this old joke bit of writing:

Coworker sent me this. Enjoy.