I want a Joel Osteen movie starring Nicolas Cage.

Looks like Joel’s hair clippers need more power, ARGH! ARGH! ARGH! ARGH!

You’re suppose to schedule your death, like everyone else!

Part of the problem is that Japan doesn’t look like Japan anymore. It’s kind of a modern vs post-modern thing. The biggest change is that color choices in signs and facades are more uniform or more muted. There are still places that are loud and proud with every color in the visible spectrum, but they still look very…

For me, the buildings in Shinjuku & Ikebukuro look more iconic than the buildings in Shibuya. But Shibuya has more LED billboards now, so it’s prettier.

Because this problem is not happening to everyone, that means only Switches from certain batches are affected. And if the Splatoon bundle isn’t using some Switches made last year for whatever reason, then the factory that created the defective units is still making them... and the problem hasn’t been found or…

Just to drive home how stupid those things are, I was in Inchon International Airport last year and while waiting in line at customs there were, naturally, Samsung TVs everywhere. Front and center of the room was a gigantic curved Samsung display and to the left of the center of the screen was a thick, solid band of…

Take away: Do not dock your Switch.

Only for it to be eaten by a larger drone mere minutes after learning how to hover.

Headcanon: The Simpsons exists in a universe where NASA didn’t go bankrupt but was under pressure to retire the orbiters and replace them with something “flashier”. Hence why all the appearances of the real space shuttle show it grounded (iOS game) or old and busted (“For sale: $1").

The elusive JGPS tag reappears.

/r/PrequelMemes is not going to like this.

I sent Google Maps a report back in 2012 when it gave me walking directions up a freeway offramp to a backdoor for an entertainment complex that it did not have, and it never got fixed. That’s not a small problem, that’s the kind of mistake that can lead to people dying.

Well, when it came to the shuttle you either landed it or it landed you.

Makes sense, I can’t recall ever seeing the smaller one being used in public. Five year old girls hoisting up pink XLs like they’re playing with a folded iPad.

Celebrate by posting on Twitter, because Konami don’t give two shits.

Combined runtime between all six films: 18 hours

Combined runtime between all six films: 18 hours

In another universe, that image is the winning submission to a Something Awful Photoshop Phriday.

Well now I don’t even want to live anymore.