We’re lame and bring in our own popcorn. Here’s why: one of the few things in my life that I refuse to eat is movie theater popcorn. It’s always greasy, chewy, and just generally gross. We pop our popcorn at home, put juuuuust enough melted butter to coat it, then toss it with Old Bay and a shitload of nutritional…
Welp, I’m jealous as hell
I bought the Metal Slug collection for my PS4. It’s great, because you get unlimited lives. BEAUTIFUL damn game, hard as NAILS
Bingo
When I first started waiting tables, I was legitimately offended that aioli was shorthand for mayo, since the real thing is SOOOOOO much better
Cottage cheese mixed with pineapple OR cottage cheese on some well-toasted bread with copious salt and pepper and maybe some red onion are the only good ways to eat it.
Dying at this. Took me a year to pay off
Nice
You could always just grab her by the pussy then ask her how she feels about it
*Furiously praying for a Raptors/Celtics conference finals*
Friend of mine interned there. He once brought up legalized pot, and the company execs said, ominously, “we have plans in place for when that goes national”
What is happening in that picture of cats? Is there a cat management sim? Can you manage an army of cats?? Can those cats then perform tasks?? Can they fight for you??? Cat fight club???!1?
Goddammit, you’re right. I’ll turn in my bourbon nerd badge and gun...
I flew in to a bachelor party, where a friend of mine had told me they had bought me a ticket. Bad news: they didn’t, which I only found out once I was at the actual airport. Hungover as shit, the guy at the desk tells me the only seat they have left for the day is first class. $1000. I wearily pull out my credit card.
That picture of you is like a nerd photoshop. Holy shit. Even I want to take your lunch money.
Irritated Ian
At this point, the Pappy that’s available is just Eagle Rare that’s been carefully aged and selected. There’s really no point to buying it anymore
Darren Wilson and George Zimmerman are two people whose mashed potato faces are branded in my brain. I see either of them, I’m immediately looking for a way to smash a brick over their heads