Not before we move Joanna and Chip Gaines. Especially Joanna.

Of course. I’ve dated a couple and shagged a couple of more.

The Preakness: Also known as tongue-stud paradise. Typified by photo number two.

Also, I think, plowed, filled up with cum, and heading to either the abortion clinic or police station within the next month.

Black people gave up on that shit years ago after Atlanta shut down Freaknik. Besides, we want to be gainfully employed.

That chick is better-looking than Amy Schumer. But both are full inside.

Or a Vegemite sandwich.

Younger me: Would be nice to hit them white girls up. But risks of wrongful imprisonment is too great.

He’ll put it down after he puts it down inside her. Priorities.

Photos three through five end with stripping, sodomy, and regret.

Personally, I don’t get it because there’s no reason to keep Jay around when you know the defense is at least a season if not more away from being decent and Jay’s not getting any younger or healthier. Would you rather have seen this Bears team win 4-6 games with Cutler at the helm or win 2-4 with Hoyer, Barkley…

The Dallas offensive line is the same as last year and the same as in 2014, when it went to the playoffs and lost to Green Bay. The defense isn’t marginally different from last year in terms of personnel. What did Dallas in last year were injuries (especially to Romo and to Sean Lee), as well as the failure of the…

As I said, dysfunction breeds dysfunction. Cutler has to take some responsibility for his development or lack thereof because he is a professional. Even if conditions aren’t great, you still have to choose how to conduct yourself. And in all honesty, Cutler could have long ago worked on his tendency to gamble, as well…

The issue in Denver is more-complex than you think. Ted Sundquist, who drafted Cutler when he was in Denver, explains it in a piece he wrote last year. To summarize: Denver was also unstable, with Mike Shanahan being replaced by Josh Daniels* (who, like Shanahan initially), didn’t want Cutler around. Cutler wanted to…

The stats cannot be denied, and I would take Smith over Cutler any day. But Cutler has always been a gambler and played on teams (from Vanderbilt to the Bears) that have lacked positive stability and have never focused on taming Cutler’s gambling tendencies. Smith, on the other hand, has never been a Kenny…

Anyone with a brain would take Smith over Cutler. At the same time, let’s remember that Smith, talented as he is and smart at the position as he is (something Cutler, a persistent Stabler-like gambler, lacks), has also benefited lately from working with Jim Harbaugh and Andy Reid, both of which are fine coaches.…

Given that Cutler has worked with almost no positive stability in Chicago (including at least five offensive coordinators and suffering through the Lovie Smith era), he couldn’t have been part of a winning formula at any point. The Bears have either had terrible defenses, shoddy offensive pieces, subpar coaching or…

I agree with most of this. Cutler isn’t a great quarterback. But there are a lot of teams that have worse (Houston, Cleveland) starting for them — and the Bears haven’t exactly lined up a successor worthy of him. Next year’s draft doesn’t even look promising on the quarterback front, and it will be difficult to lure a…

Wrong again. Take genocide, for example. There may be a number of complex factors that contribute to people participating in mass atrocities. But at the end of the day, no matter the complex reasons, the simple matter is that some people decided to commit mass murders against others, that they could have decided not…

Nothing is ever as complex as it seems. Even amid complexity, there are simple lines that can be traced. Because we are, at the end of the day, rather simple creatures.