Dunk my nuts in your mouth

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Because they don’t serve Old Crow at Dairy Queen, they keep telling you.

“This case involves a human tragedy of Shakespearean proportions”

With all of the staff layoffs and budget cuts, ESPN simply can’t afford to build a Heisman Houseboat.

To quote Clarkson, Hammond, and May

“Ha, just scrolled down to post this,” guffawed Tanny Glover wholeheartedly.

The ghost of Elmore Leonard is coming for Leilen Shelton.

That’s nothing, Freddy Adu was 18 when he was 12.

Or a house. A boat. A car. Collage. Tuition. A pool. A dog. Sub zero fridge. Some beer. Some kfc. Some gum balls. Bow and arrows.

Tom, maybe you didn’t watch the video, but the Ravens were offsides. It’s a free play, and the results count only if the Rams want them to — the Rams accepted the penalty, so nothing that happened the last play actually happened. No play, no concussion. Case closed.

Why can’t we just use the ******* chips already. They are miles ahead of magnetic strips in terms of security. I’m sick of hearing, oh sorry, that isn’t set up yet. YOU ARE FREAKING MAJOR RETAILER, GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER. I’m tired of dealing with getting a new card every four months.

So Brady Hoke got a job as a head injury spotter?

I can't imagine the scorching takes we would hear if Cam Newton a friend named Sugar Cane.

Ferrari’s leather wrapped fire extinguishers.

Fake, plastic, stuck on fender vents. The next designer who draws a car with fake fender vents should be beaten with a stick.

Oh now you guys like previous Lincolns.

Did I make it in before all the “tarted up Ford” haters? No?

1st Gear: This has proven to me that no matter what Lincoln does people are going to hate. 400hp and AWD, nope doesnt matter since the grille is too close to Jagaur. Alright everybody no oval=ish shaped grilles, Jagaur owns that.