Let’s all kindly remember who their customer base is now: middle aged traditional Southern and Midwestern white women.

1. What is Vera Bradley? Is it Kate Spade adjacent?

I did better than that as a 16-year-old wannabe goth with a dull black crayon-liner in hand, attempting to scribble on the ol’ eye-curlicues for the first time. But not MUCH better, mind you. ^^

Or they could try making bags that don’t remind me of the bedspread in a Radisson circa 1994?

How about while chaperoning your kid’s face-painting birthday party? That’s the only place it’d really fit in, although if you wanted it to also be appreciated, there would have to be booze.

Some of these remind me of when plastic surgeons mark all the things they’re going to change on their patients.

My girlfriend and I are both looking at this trying to figure out an occasion when she could actually try this out. The only conclusion we came up with is maybe New Years Eve?

No.

Not so strange for a person in their 70s to be awake in the middle of the night. I’m in my 70s and am almost always awake at 2:00 or 3:00 am. Wake up for the bathroom, and since you don’t have to get up the next morning to go to work, there’s a tendency to just stay up awhile, play on Facebook, whatever. I seem to do…

Maybe ryanbot is programmed to ignore anyone who is not a white man.

Ahhhh, he’s such a cunt.

We need to hypnotize a cop into thinking he’s an unarmed black man.

I really love his instance that having a good night's sleep is some nefarious plot of Clinton's. He stays up late, hate-tweeting, popping uppers and eating fast food, which is waaaay better than letting your body and mind rest and repair itself. That is why he is always so pulled together and professional.

And I say people who say that need to explain why my six-year-old deserves to suffer for other people’s bad decisions.

The planet deserves better and it can’t vote.

It is ironically notable that Trump’s vision of forcefully fellating all the oil from the country would drive oil prices lower and continue to crush his BFF Vladdy the Daddy Putin’s economy.

That’s a fucking stupid answer on so many levels, but notably in terms of environmental destruction: that fucks the rest of the world, too. (As do like, half of Drumpf's policies, but as this is an article on the environmental side, I'm rolling with that.)

None of the Clinton Foundation controversy, however, is quite as blatant as what we’re allegedly looking at with Trump.

But, emails or something!?!?

I’m tickled. Not for their children, but fuck Angelina. Brad, too. No sympathy for them as a couple.