I went from a C student to an A student in college by making these simple changes:

OMG, this is the worst article ever! It's a sure sign our entire civilization is collapsing! It makes me what to run down the street screaming, puking on random people, and smashing cars with a hammer!

Ok, so we have reached the magic number.

I was gong to take the fifth, on this one, but I'm not sure if this qualifies as evil, and really, the Mounties, Homeland Security, the FBI, the CIA, the NSA, and the State department are all aware of what happened that night and have just told me never to do it again.