Yeah the time came a long long time ago and most Brits already figured that out. Why do you think we tried to export him? We saw what the Canadians did with Bieber and thought we’d try it with Morgan. Not as successful unfortunately.

He certainly will, Darling.

Federal scientist here. The raw data we collect has to go through a time-consuming check/approval process before it’s fit for public consumption because people rely on that data for recreation/agriculture/infrastructure/construction. Our data is also collected and transmitted via telemetry, which like NASA’s, isn’t…

Okay, where to start...

I still remember Natalie Portman telling a story about how Winona Ryder gave her a letter apologizing for having to scream at Portman during their Black Swan scene together. Ryder said that her first boyfriend had been abusive and would yell and smash things in the heat of passion, and that it had really affected her…

Aw, let Benny alone, he’s lisping more since not getting any sleep with the new baby.

Pengwings!

As a British citizen who loves his country in most respects, I must say that our national anthem is bloody awful. Not only is it a dirge, sung at a funereal tempo, it has a subject matter that suffers in comparison to other national anthems. Most national anthems fall into one of two groups: either they mean something…

I’m disappointed that no one has posted this evergreen tidbit yet (it comes after the ‘5 Gold Rings’ bit:

All meringue is dairy free. It’s egg whites whipped with sugar.

I hate to be pedantic (jk I love being pedantic) but “bosom” refers to a woman’s chest. It is generally used in the singular, unless you are talking about Donald Trump reviewing the contestants’ bosoms.

I have three episodes of Peep Show left and I am spacing them out and savoring them because I don't want it to end :(

LOOK AT THAT LITTLE BABY IN THE POCKET PANNNNNTS. OMMMMMG.

God, I love that movie. I need to watch it again...

No because there are so many celebrities and we have to determine if they are woke or baes, so we cannot have any actually funny or interesting content.

I’m sure Jesus totes approves of this asshole.

Soooooo are we not going to talk about the fact that Princess Leia and her dog are on the red carpet with Loki?

Smoking fumes all in your clothes and hair, plus spritzes of perfume. PLEASE never be on an airplane with me.

My wife and I have between us about 8k pics of our three lively kitties because they slay. Samwise forced me to make a meme of him. I told him you can’t just “make” a meme. Then he was all: