Considering the formal definitions of “epidemic,” I’m pretty sure any president since 1990 could effectively claim the epidemic to be over, as the infection rate has fallen to something resembling a baseline.

You should get greyed for trying to make “Musk-holes” happen. 

IDPs are such a waste of time...

The way to gain access to the game is to have Randy do a magic trick for you.

Madden kinda suffers from a similar thing. People found that the banners on the club-level areas of the stadiums read “Madden 19" instead of “Madden 20.”

I Never Had My Butt Fingered: A Cautionary Tale.

GBA was always special to me because it was the first console I saved up to buy on my own. I eventually upgraded my OG one to an SP, because backlight of course. Then this last weekend I added a GameBoy Micro to my collection when a shop near me got a minty one traded in, box and all. I’ve always wanted one and I love…

Your grandpa sounds like a pretty cool guy

Rob Gronkowski says he couldn’t sleep for weeks after a fairly routine hit in the Super Bowl

A Sony Gameboy

Is that Peter King’s burner? 

He’s a role model for every high school kid, surviving a cock block on the way to second base.

On top of that, A. Rodgers made the Bears his bitch year in and out, and your fuck shit defense is ending that trend this year, and B. seeing Clinton-Dix in a Bears jersey is going to fucking hurt

When I realized you could unlock fighters through it, i gave it a shot and then realized it was an even slower and more boring method of doing so than just playing classic Smash. I can’t remember the last time I disliked a mode of an otherwise fun game this much.

I am hard pressed to think of another video game feature that I am less interested in than the Spirit Board.

I miss the one in melee. Wish they would add that mode to Smash. 

I want to get off Mr. Bones’ Wild Ride

I thought I was the only one who missed the Big New Yorker.

I find morbid humor in imagining it being a really small yard, like he buried four and ran out of space.

“You have to get more into my body.”