"We want to see if you can keep acting after being struck by a falling Spiderman."

Everything that comes out of Lillian's mouth is delightful.

Thanks, I find that reassuring and hilarious.

Why is the frame moving up and down? Have I gone mad?

Query: How far into the movie were you when you realized that it was filmed to resemble a single long take? I realized this around the time that he returned back to his dressing room for the first time (around 5 or 6 minutes into the film).

To be fair, it's difficult to identify that digital short as parody because it's SO DAMN UNFUNNY.

I'm not familiar enough with the recent superhero films he's been in to attest to those, so I just have to assume Samuel L. Jackson is referring to M. Night Shyamalan films. Yes, "Unbreakable" is far superior to "The Last Airbender."

It's my white whale. I search for it obsessively.

I organized and presented all this poorly. I value the opinions of journalists more than many other opinions; but, what I primarily expect from them are the relevant facts. If I have the time and the taste for subjective views after becoming informed on the important going-ons of the nation and world, I'd be happy to…

I'm just here for the clickbait title.

Spit water at my computer screen. Now everything's ruined.
You'll be hearing from my attorney shortly.

I choose to believe this was supposed to be a Clickhole article.

This was supposed to be a Clickhole article. Or perhaps a Jack Donaghy NBC pitch.

"Fancy" has started growing on me in the past few days. I think it may be some form of Stockholm Syndrome, as I have found myself being bombarded by it from any and every media outlet (with the exception of my car radio, which plays primarily NPR). I mean, "Fancy" is being used as the background music to at least…

Whew, I feared I was the only one laughing (giggling? chuckling?)

O'Neal's been waiting a long time to use that title.

Breaking news, AMC has picked up Hieroglyph, saying "We can do it better because we can give it nudity."

I've noticed that the writers are giving us plenty of terrible, misogynistic Healy-isms, then suddenly presenting some very small redeeming trait or action from him. For that reason, I don't think he's ever gone full-bad-guy (which is probably more realistic), and I couldn't figure out an opinion of him that I could…

I found his reintroductions nearly flawless (Bitchin' Camaro? Yes, more please), so I thoroughly enjoyed the few scenes we got with him. It sucks for him to go off to prison, but we all know that he has the potential to do well for himself on the other side of the system. Therefore, let us revel in his shameless…

The Buzzfeed-ers are the ones who sympathize solely with Morello and turn a blind eye to her stalking.