Per Gawker policy, the only way to be financially successful is to be an awful human being who will be up against the wall come the revolution. Nobody ever comes by money through honesty, talent, or hard work.

Hamilton envies people who can afford $2m worth of jewelry, and he ascribes independent moral significance to his emotions.

The problem is that she worked for her money and then purchased the jewelry.

I’m waiting to hear what the issue is with having $2m worth of jewelry.

Being forced to watch the White House orientation video must have been tough for him, since it doesn’t mention him. The part about sexual harassment in the workplace must have been uncomfortable.

One time, I forgot about a presentation I had in fourth grade. I didn’t research or read anything. Totally forgot about it for weeks. I did my best to wing it, but I only fooled the other idiot kids in the room, not my teacher. Every time Trump speaks, I hear that presentation.