She uses a voice phone to dictate her tweets to Fitzgibbon Media, which posts them to Twitter for her.

Oh man. I can’t even tell you how much my 7-year-old daughter would love to sit next to you and have you explain how planes work. Have you considered hiring yourself out for this service? ‘Cause I’d totally hire you.

“Those moments, they stare back at you. You don’t remember them, they remember you. Turn around, there they are.”

This comment is so perfect I want to have it cast in bronze.

Lord, EVERY vacation with my parents. Every single one. My mother is the most negative and difficult person on the planet, and somehow she would always, ALWAYS find a reason to declare our vacation “ruined” before we made it off our own street. The car ride would be pure misery, with her pouting and sulking and…

It absolutely has to be a wig, right? Because otherwise she’d have pale blonde roots shining through every few weeks and surely people would question that.

1) What did Pao do to deserve one of the worst jobs ever? This sounds even more terrible than my worst-ever job (“supervisor” who took the last-level complaint calls from raging customers.)

Really? Damn, I always figured the people they cast were the ones who FAILED those tests.

He is horrible and you are wonderful. Screw him.