where’s the option for “have the hairs on my upper lip ripped out with a cotton thread and nearly cry when they go all the way up to the edge of my nose”

when family members refer to my hair as the “Mexi-fro” i gently remind them to knock that shit off and use its one true name, The Beast.

“why is it okay for black people to straighten their hair but white people can’t wear afros?? i don’t get mad when the blacks straighten their hair!! we all need to stop being so easily offended!! one race!! the human race!!”

i wanted one for my birthday but noooooooo apparently they’re only in mexicoooo and noooo we can’t drive down to tijuana to buy you a stupid pinataaaaaaaa

i read a comment where someone interpreted the obama comment as “yeah i could totally wipe my ass with the constitution and be president again but unlike certain people in your history i’m actually respecting the laws of democracy and stepping down at the end of my allowed term”

mac, sephora, CLINIQUE, colour pop, and i’m slowly loving anastasia beverly hills and jeffree star cosmetics

oh my god i came here to post about that!! my nana used to love the coty brand lipstick too - when she couldn’t find it anymore, she was devastated

i’m taking your advice. i’m making a screwdriver.

TOM AND I STILL HAVE A CHANCE

i chase vodka with beer and eat chinese food at 2 in the morning, where the hell is my lifestyle site

I KNEW IT

with this whole thing, am I the only one who thought mama nicki was talking about miley cyrus and her win for wrecking ball last year, before tswift butted in?

my mother calls them “corpse lips”

they completely 150% shot the premise in the face when they cast cara delevingne.

my cat brought me a spider once and I practically hit the ceiling so now I think he knows not to bring me “real” hunts

my cat brings me his little stuffed toy mice as I sit on the couch with the xbox, shooting aliens. i appreciate the gesture. it’s like he’s bringing me snacks.

*hits my chest with my fist and makes a peace sign to indicate that we are still Bros*

WAKE UP, SHEEPLE

I love non-mainstream history (the best way I can think of putting it) and this was a very well-written piece! be free, nerd out 5eva <3

dude wtf no i posted first