Oh nice! I’ve heard that’s a cool one. Not very competitive but lots of fun. That’s awesome. I’ve got like 14 [I think?] gyms under my control now so I don’t usually stick around one place too long.

Well he played for the Lakers, not so sure he owned them though.

And their former part-owner, Magic Johnson. Still the most ironic name on the planet.

First thing I thought too. Where do you train?

https://www.google.com/search?q=megan…

Shit the email didn’t go through. Here, trying again

I don’t always find personal failure and emotional wreckage funny, but this time I do. Have you ever met a football kicker before? Talk about jackass. Our high school kicker was such an idiot. Showed up drunk to school, drunk to practice. Still made all those field goals and PATs. Didn’t even have to try.

Neither did I, however, and I’m not going around mugging other grammas. I would probably mug mine if she was still around though. Not really. But she was very mean. She looked like a Buick and drove a Buick so yeah...

Ok? This is her actually.

Not so fast, actually. Many if not all pawn shops would rather sell that piece for a profit than become part of a crime investigation. You never know what’s other crimes are going on in the pawn shop.

No, like a 9.5 out of 10. On the 10 point scale that people use to rate beauty. Hey, I’m sure you’ve heard of it. Don’t mess with me about this =P

I’m literally tearing up at this story and just as I typed that a tear actually dropped on my space bar. Great, a sticky space bar for the rest of the day. Why are we doing this? What kind of world is this when our grammas can’t just go home comfortably and make some dinner and watch tv and then go to bed? What kind…

Nice! Way to make the most of your day off!

Wait, your brother is bipolar or bisexual? Or is your best friend a girl? Don’t know many guys with a girl best friend. Sexual tensions and such.

Had a bad breakup just like that too. My gf at the time was probably a 9 1/2. She was 5'8", 105lbs, hourglass figure but still pretty petite you know? Except for the chest. I swear, if we didn’t live in Boston she would have spent all her time on the beach. She had like 25 different bikinis. And then she had this one…

+1

Already much better than Deadspin imo and I’ve been commenting on Deadspin for a really long time actually.

“OK fellas please stay just like that and pretend you’re talking. Keep it casual you know? This is a haircut. Just a haircut. You guys look great by the way. Hey, Jerry, unbutton your smock. Yeah. Alright we got this guys. Hey Mike? Lean your head a little toward me? Great Mike. God you guys have done this before huh?…

Guarantee he requested to have his hair cut in the white robe instead of the black one. His shiny white hair doesn’t even show up on that thing. Mission accomplished I guess. SMH

Shit. Alright let’s get em next time then.