I should have been born into this culture.

1. If you ever said puppies are better than cats

I can assure you the bride...

I'm getting married in several months, and I JUST DON'T TALK ABOUT MY WEDDING ON FACEBOOK. That is pretty much something I decided to stick to since I got engaged. The only mentions have been when we got engaged and one rant I went on about wacko wedding dress sizing. That's it.

That's a good reason. Party with old friends is a good reason. Celebrating your poorly written, overly theatrical vows, in front of a group of people you hijacked and put in matching satin wine bottle gift bags, and getting to take home "wedding favors" [my keyboard is bleeding from typing "wedding favors," it's a…

Absolutely. You are there for the food, alcohol, and for the opportunity to hook up with someone in the coat check, the bathroom, the elevator, the bridal suite, or the.... Or, so I've heard.

I don't. I find most brides to be quite reasonable. Brides actually get unfairly dumped on a lot in the wedding planning process. The bride in this article, however, sounds like a peach.

I'm glad the Secret Service is more sensible than the TSA

On a personal level, too, I got many reactions. On my Facebook, from my friends. It makes me feel satisfied about my work – at least the work I did is so impactful that I'm able to shed some light on this.

Madeline, I was informed in the comments the other day that Mouth Breather is unfair to people who can't breathe through their nose due to medical conditions. I have chosen to go with "You misbegotten spawn of hell!" from here on out.

That explains why they allowed the zinger to go in there.