I reject this entire story on the premise that it suggests:
A) Roger Goodell is actually human
B) Was once a child and not created, fully formed, from a giant robot womb in a poorly thought through scientific attempt to make the world’s most soulless ginger.

Typical left-wing pinko liberal media bias tactics #101: quote people accurately.

That’s ridiculous. An AL team would never sacrifice bundt.

You can!

Jared Leto tries so hard to be cool. So so so hard.

The 2002 Kings Lakers series was 100% rigged by the NBA. I don’t care what anyone says.

Figures. The first thing any kid does with a new toy. Can I use it to draw a penis. Sigh.

I didn’t know Georgia O’Keefe made wallets now.

Yep, the true inheritor of Stewart’s crown is Samantha Bee’s incisive Full Frontal. I can’t even remember the last time I watched a clip of The Daily Show, much less a full episode.

“Hope Hicks” sounds like Trump’s entire campaign strategy.

.

Pfft, that’s nothing, I've stuck people with far worse.

-Ray Lewis.

I mean, I get it. Liberte Chan strutting around in a cocktail dress is the last thing you want to see after a night of adulterated cocaine and staring down a half-written screenplay.

just to pile on Joe Buck:

Yeah, that’s Pastrami on Rye and anyone who says it’s a reuben is a filty liar.

It might be time for the Mets to convert Harvey into a reliever.

I haven’t seen this much siding with Cousins since the Hatfield/McCoy feud.

Just get him on some blood thinners, it'll stomp that problem right out.

Geno Smith