Call a script “The Big D” then get mad a reader makes a porn joke about it. Oh, ok.

“As long as the woman is enjoying herself, who the hell cares what’s coming out of her body?”

A little late to this party, but, for what it’s worth, if my wife’s last name was cooler than mine, I would have gladly taken her name. (note: she did not take mine).

“A beer.”

being on the same team as a coach’s son was always the worst.

You know what’s interesting is that looking back on my childhood, I can’t remember a single baseball or football game my team won or lost. Not one. I remember my friends, the fun of practice, the thrilling joy of a base hit or an open running lane, and most of all, the pizza parties at season’s end. Did we ever win a…

You know what’s interesting is that looking back on my childhood, I can’t remember a single baseball or football game my team won or lost. Not one. I remember my friends, the joys of practice, the thrilling joy of a base hit or an open running lane, and most of all, the pizza parties at season’s end. Did we ever win a…

Feel the same way about the Bad News Bears.

“They’ve got a loaded backfield, linebackers for days, possibly the best defensive line in football, a receiving corps that would make Dan Fouts cum in his pants, and nobody who can throw the goddamn ball.”

That is because you have no sense of humor.

On behalf of all Californians, let me say: “Huh. Forgot all about Oklahoma.”

I would like to offer this made-up “Susan” person a job at the sports blog I just created called “Race car driven by a cougar.” Or possibly, “JJ Watt’s Log Cabin.”

MINOR LEAGUE FOOTBALL.

“En ese momento”, continua, “Fortes cayó al suelo. Se hizo el quite con el capote, con una larga cambiada, pero el toro no hizo mucho caso y se fue directamente para él», detalló. «Introdujo el pitón por debajo de la mandíbula, entre el suelo y las tablas, y lo levantó a pulso: lo puso de pie”

I don’t even need to listen to know that it will be like everything else Kurt Cobain ever did:

Shouldn’t black people be saving black people?

“ they don’t have money because they are systemically oppressed, because the American voting public is in favor of them being so.”

“It’s how you avoid going home with a cart full of Flamin’ Hot Cheetos and frozen TGI Friday’s loaded potato skins.”

I’ve never understood why anybody would ever want a bar to be loud. I want to drink and talk to my friends, not drink and shout WHAT? every four seconds.

California here: We have no idea what those things are.