If I could march backward in time, I would hope to score in high school as well.

It’s a marathon, not a sprint.

Don’t: Use “Trim” in this context, ever again.

Philips Norelco QG3364/42 Multigroom Beard Trimmer

Philips Norelco QG3364/42 Multigroom Beard Trimmer

At his age, Trump should know a lot about “going soft.”

Thankfully, it didn’t get off to a bad start like this.

Apparently, it’s a thing now, and that’s alarming.

thanks blair

Offended Iowans should take the same advice conservatives give to minorities when they are offended: "stop being so sensitive."

After a while it gets boring bringing your trucks to the same spot at the far end of the Walmart parking lot and you start thinking “guys, what if maybe there’s more to life”

Crawford is basically a competent version of Frank Drebin masquerading as an umpire.

Yours wasn’t at all sexy.

So now officially Miami stole a win from Indiana at this point? I’m confused.

HOT TAKES CAN’T MELT STEEL BEAMS!

He meant that in terms of hygiene not in terms of poor sportsmanship. They wear the same damned pair of underwear day after day.

Why would anyone get a tattoo of Mikhail Gorbachev’s birthmark?

Jesus is the only one who can perform miracles, like having a perfect 15-1 season.

Jamarcus fooled them all with that combine workout

Somewhere, a ‘STICK TO SPORTS!!1!!1!’ Deadspin commenter sits in front of a computer screen, sweating, unable to move, broken.