I enjoy playing with make-up, but I have never carried anything but lipstick with me when I leave the house. Am I girling wrong?

Calvin Harris is still Taylor Swift’s boyfriend, no?

Statutory rape isn’t the issue — if she was under 18 when the tape was made and it gets distributed, that’s child porn.

Yeah, I have to agree. None of us commenting here are the subject of paparazzi harassment. He might not have been worried about another ER patient so much as a tabloid photographer who could waltz right into his room and get $10k for a photo of Taylor Swift’s ex with a bloody gash across his face.

If I ever watched myself have sex, I’d probably never want to have sex again. You gotta give it to porn stars, they make it look so great.

I - shamefully, but whatevs - read celebrity gossip daily. I would not be able to pick him out in a crowd. Someone’s suffering a little bit from delusions of grandeur.

Does he really think the people having emergencies in the emergency room give even half a shit about some random white guy who looks like every other white guy on this planet?

You know she was like “now here’s my scandal” to Ryan, and he’s all, “I’m gonna get you home and ugh, double up, ugh ugh.”

I immediately got the Baby Got Back reference, but that doesn't make this any less cringeworthy. I always thought that was a disrespectful line in the song anyway (like, women from Oakland can't have a pretty face? WTF), and it's extremely tone deaf for Blake to caption her picture using it. She's got to be doing this…

Yeah, I see what you’re getting at, Jezebel, but I’m feelin’ hella old over here.

I blame shit on batman all the time. Especially affleck batman.

Have you guys seen this???

Yeah, but he’s an adorable little shit.

I’m somewhat of a connoisseur of little shits and I get more of a high-spirited vibe from George.

Really? I’m not even a baby person but his chubby cheeks make my ovaries explode.

Yeah but did they scream “I FEEL LIKE I’M LIVING IN AN INSANE ASYLUM” after their kids have been yelling, whining and fighting for an hour, like I did tonight? If so the royals REALLY ARE just like me!