Hey third party voters/Susan Sarandon/people who didn’t bother to vote because of reasons aren’t you soooooo glad you didn’t vote for Hillary Clinton? You have to keep in mind that in every election the fate of the SCOTUS is at stake

I got beef with you now, Summers:

My husband and I used only condoms for the 22 years we’ve been together. I had a hysterectomy a couple of years ago, so it’s no longer an issue, but I didn’t want to be on hormonal bc because of my depression. Never had one break, never got pregnant. I’ve noticed that Jez seems to really have a boner for IUDs as if…

Thank you for recognizing that your readers (and their families) belong to all age groups :) I really appreciate this!

this is one of the prime reasons I always rethink editing my original appearance too much -

The only sane way I can read it is that she was suffering some kind of PTSD after witnessing a shooting, which is understandable. There is some ultra-weird shit here though. Why wouldn’t you turn down your blaring music when 80 cops and a SWAT team pulled you over? Particularly when both your skin color and your…

I mis-read the headline and thought it said, “A Woman And Her Chinchilla.”

You do you, boo.

I’m always curious about what it’s like for children to have parents who have undergone plastic surgery. What happens if your nose (for example) looks like the mother’s original nose, the nose that she thought was ugly?  What would it be like to grow up knowing that your features were deemed “not good. enough” by your…

The thing that always gets me is the people getting the most dramatic, expensive work done have the money to just look great by less dramatic means.

Like, Meryl Streep has probably gotten Botox or some subtle enhancers, and she doesn’t look like she’s in her 40s but she looks fantastic. She is probably using a great…

My girlfriend of 40 years had her eyes done. She did not tell me she was having the procedure and I didn’t see her for about 5 weeks. When I did see her again I just kept looking at her and saying...’you look great’. Then I asked her if she was using some new miracle cosmetic or going for facials or what ... because…

All of these home reno reality shows seem to skip over quality to keep deadlines. You want quality work? I think This Old House is your only option.

Jesus...I hope the grouter got that in writing and signed off that they know this is fuckery.

Yep.

lol. Andy Dwyer beat you to it. :) “Uncured Slab new band name I called it!!”

And it’s always something about how Uncle Hal lost his leg in a thresher when he was a boy, but still managed to operate the family coal mine. He was a generous man. A good man. A christian man. So we’ll make a window frame out of anthracite in the shape of a cross. God bless.

Notice how even in the simplest baking-type competition shows, the clock is always somewhere out of view of the typical camera shots? So many of those crunches are fabricated beyond belief and they don’t want a shot spoiled by the audience being able to tell there’s way more time left than they’re making it seem.

I get where you’re coming from but...

Most spell checkers don’t recognize phrases, just individual words - not to mention “per se” is Latin, which doesn’t help matters. I love the English language but it is seriously fucked up.

Before all that, it’s time to check out last week’s winners. These are the best comebacks you’ve ever heard.