I was tending bar in a pretty small town and chatting up one of my best regular customers who excitedly told me his son, J who was just my age, was moving to town in a few months. I laughed it off and moved on until a few months later he said he couldn’t wait to set us up. I told him that I had started seeing someone…

In a perfect world, with a good boss and fair labor practices, sure! In the real world, announcing something like that can get you “mommy tracked” way before you’re ready to be. I have a very physical job (12 hour shifts on my feet with moderate heavy lifting) and I didn’t tell my boss until I was visibly showing,…

Shit... Don’t tell my toddler that not having his own kids at all is the perfect way to make me regret saying things like “when you have your kids, I’m going to feed them alllllll the candy and then send them back home to you!” It’s the small piece of parental schadenfreude I have to look forward to!

This was my mom! I was a sin of an oopsie when she was 25, so they fudged my due date and managed to fool everyone until I decided to show up 3 weeks early...which was like 2 months in fake due date land (yet, not premature!) Sister was planned and they tried for over a year and my mom had her at 29. My poor little…

I also totally expected to be back in my usual cloth by 2 months and that.... That didn’t happen. I survived in looser tops (with maternity jeans) and a spaghetti strap underneath for nursing purposes. I invested in 3 amazing nursing bras, popped a week ass spaghetti strap on top and would pop my boob out of the top…

I got my paraguard 6 weeks after my baby while I was still breastfeeding. They warned after I stopped that and combination with the new IUD that my periods would be crazy the first couple months (and they were). Now however, my periods are more intense, but shorter. I used to bleed for 7-9 days, but never heavy, I…

Lifelong bartender here weighing in. If there is something special about the glassware, talk to the bartender about it, even make a joke about stealing it and gauge their response, it will probably go one of 3 ways:

I don’t think that’s anecdotal at all. It’s a super important cog in all of this. One of my best friends had a car accident a few years back and was prescribed Oxy for her back pain. The problem is, that a symptom of withdrawal is...back pain! So every time she stopped taking them, her back would hurt and convince her…

Originally I was not going to leave the house, work, or take care of the baby, and just cuddle up with a vodka soda and a good book for the entire day. While that sounded like a dream, after reading and thinking more about the messages I want to send to those around me, I have decided on the following plan for the…

When I got pregnant, I was working 4 jobs and my now-husband was unemployed. I dialed in my friend who had two abortions she did not regret and also two kids, who are amazing. I worried how I could make it work with an infant working 80 hours a week. She asked me what I would do if my boyfriend was making 100k a year…

I’m hoping this will be helpful, if it ends up making you feel worse, I am so sorry, that it certainly not my intent. I’m in a similar relationship dynamic in many ways, but I’m the person usually asking my husband to (in my words) “do better.” He is currently unemployed because he quit his job a few months ago…

Born and raised in Phoenix, Arizona. My hottest day was 122. Anything up to 105 is bearable, but after that it’s nonsense. The shittiest part is the days in summer where it hardly dips below 100 in a 24 hour span. It can be midnight and still be 100 degrees out and that’s gross. But not as gross as the cold, which I…

What a jackass!

Please help me name my blog! I’ve loved writing since pretty much forever, but I really found my stride over the last couple years. Right now, I chanel it into my personal Facebook, but I want to branch out. What has stopped me is I can’t think of a damn name for it! My most relatable posts seem to be about being a…

I meet a lot of Canadian tourists my line of work and whenever we get to talking Healthcare this is my go to story showing how messed up our system is.

I can’t remember when I, myself knew we were rich, but it was always heavily ingrained in me how privileged we were. When I was born, my mother was just beginning as a dental hygienist putting my dad through law school and the only thing they ever bought for me as an infant were suppositories (a great story they loved…

After last week’s craft thread, I wandered over to your etsy shop and got the “Fluffy but deadly” which arrived this week and will make the PERFECT gift for my sister, so thank you!! If you have any dogs or cats who need some cute collars, take a look at the link at the link and comment “jezebel” in the notes to…

This!! When my son was born every single grandparent had to pick their own special name. My poor kid has an Oma, Opa, Nona, Popa, Meemaw, and a Lolo. I can’t even keep them all straight, much less my 2 year old.

I never even knew going to the movies on Thanksgiving was a thing until I worked near a theater. I just wish we could go back to when pretty much everything was closed. Or force employers to give staff some sort of bonus or extra pay for working federal holidays. Have fun at the casino and I hope you build up a bunch…

Not that I’ll get out of the greys, but I need to fucking rant into the void where none of my managers can hear me scream. I have to work tomorrow. From 3pm to 12am. There is zero hope of having anything resembling a Thanksgiving (my favorite holiday) with my toddler and husband. I’m a bartender and we’re open all…