Rainy weather. Athletic activities. Swimming. These are just three things that are better without glasses.

Didn’t wanna brag, but okay. So there I was. Totally mana fucked but with a bunch of slivers in play and with a Reiver Demon in my hand. Things were looking grim as my opponent kept launching goblins at me, and I had no flying creatures to block them. My next draw? A Gemhide Sliver. Since I already had a Blur Sliver,…

Don’t worry. It’s impossible to brag about something nobody cares about. Now, sit back and let me tell you about the time I crushed the competition at my friends’ local Magic The Gathering tournament...

And I was skinnier than those dancers, who are also very skinny.

So your take is Jesus killed them. Brilliant.

A little from column A, a little from column B.

Yeah, and that bullshit came out of Mark Jackson’s mouth.

Jesus died for you sins, so do whatever the fuck you want guilt-free! Twelve years of Catholic school here, and that was my biggest takeaway. As a piece of garbage human being with a busy schedule, it really is the only religion I have time for.

my guitar guy

I was patting myself on the back for making it to 1:20.

Suck all the rich dick you want. They’ll never let you into their club.

My guess is this was done by someone who knows him.

I can live with that. Thanks for clarifying.

I’ve usually seen people trot out that saying when someone engages in risky behavior and gets burned. But, a silly video warrants a swatting? The world needs more silly, man.

For whatever reason, it brought me back to high school, and the stupid but harmless inside jokes we made up. It’s the kind of young fun I can get behind.

Get the national anthem out of sporting events first, and then we can have a conversation about removing politics from sports. Not to mention, do they yank the mic away whenever some blockhead starts thanking God for winning a child’s game? If you win, you get a platform to express yourself. That’s the American way.

You’re really passionate about this issue. How nice for you.

Sports? Important.

This is fucked. Future generations will look back and wonder why we tolerated so many deaths from car accidents. Minority Report-style, computer-driven cars can’t get here fast enough.

Aw, man. There’s so many. I love it when Binky’s cracks start to show.

“You know why I’m not gonna change?”