Lol. I’m old. Apparently I needed to watch a little more actively than passively while playing mindless games on my phone and drinking wine coolers. :/

Eeeew I forgot about Danielle. Ew. Speaking of enlightenment, as an Indian woman I’m really hating the constant reference to ‘Namaste Teresa.’ NO.

Caroline got her own show because Andy Cohen loves her and the Manzo family. He always has his favourites. Sort of like Bethenny.

If you really want to see what she’s really like you will have to watch all those seasons but I really wouldn’t wish it on anyone. It gets so dark. There’s something really perverse in watching family members go after each other so aggressively and with such hostility.

“Satchels of gold rhinestones!”

It’s not a simple corporate bankruptcy. They personally embezzled money out of the company so they wouldn’t have to pay creditors, including charities. All their businesses seem to be tied to charities in some way so it’s probably an old m.o.

No, it’s pretty clear how much she worships her father. I think he teases her a lot because that’s his way of showing affection but with children it can be hurtful. Milania has a strong personality so people probably think she’s made of stone when she’s still a child and quite sensitive. I felt really sad hearing that…

There is only one person worse than Jacqueline on RHONJ, and that is Jacqueline 2: The Revenge, a/k/a Ashlee.

But the context was Teresa saying she never asked about her legal troubles. Teresa’s statement was pretty general and for once I genuinely think that’s what Teresa meant. I don’t think Teresa was ever comparing the specific cases but comparing that she never asked about her legal business. Then Jacqueline had to make…

I found Milania and Joe’s relationship really sweet last night. Am I ill?

Well, Richard Lawson did the best Real Housewives recaps when he wrote for Gawker so read those before they’re gone forever! They were far better than the shows themselves.

I’m childless so my husband and I have been coasting on the edge of trashed since college. WHEEEEEE!

Look if you’re going to hang out on Jezebel you have to at least watch one episode of the Housewives series. It’s our method of hazing.

Maybe it was one of those things where you both agree no strings attached, but you secretly hope that, over time, he’ll come around and want to be with you? NOT THAT I’VE EVER BEEN THERE OR ANYTHING. But seriously. I think it all sunk in for her at the party on the boat, when he was so dismissive of her. That seemed…

That’s So Raven Ramona.

So, Dorinda has a coke problem, right?

I think they do. And when she was going on about how her and The Count had an open relationsihp but she didn’t actually like it - she just knew she had to accept it - I think that was some seeeerrrious transference. She’s really talking about Tom. She was for real upset when she said to Bethany “please don’t do this…

You know what would make a shit-storm of a show? Ramona and Tamra... two women with no souls... on ONE SHOW! BAM! Thank you, and have a good night.

Dorinda is a master Housewife. She recognized that she and John were becoming the Hot Messes of the Season so she deflected and started shit stirring to amp up the other dramas. Her exclusion of Sonja made me really dislike her though. It just seemed so Mean Girls.

How about when Bethany’s being all annoying and saying ‘well if they’re this late they better show up looking like Linda Evangelista and Stephanie Seymour or they can take a walk” and Sonja just sweetly sighs away they line.... “well they’ll be taking a walk then”.