Finally. This company has been horrible to the ozone layer.

They look like they’re thinking “where are my keys”?

How about you take some initiative for once in your spoiled self-centered life and set them on fire yourself?

I keep on thinking it’s going to be pronounced like “Surreal.”

The child’s nickname will be cornflakes

Putin will bring menstruating women with him into a meeting to scare Trump.

“Gump.” It’s just a weird spelling.

“Laura, do you even know what transgender means?”
“I think so. It’s when you look down at your privates and go, Why I oughta.”

At least the number of dystopian novels with rebellion plots recently have given us a gluttony of plans of attack to choose from. Soon we might be finding out exactly how far we’ve strayed from the roots of our country; I have to say, I never thought I’d be able to fully comprehend the emotional states of the…