Self absorbent guys arent all bad. You can use them to clean wine spills.

“I’m the founder of a start-up focused on the coffee market in Yemen; that’s my No. 1 priority”

“I consider myself to be more respectful to women than the average guy”

I’m showing my husband this comment because even though this was 10 yrs ago he still swears I did it on purpose to get out of cleaning it up. because  throwing up is fun. But in all seriousness if I see or hear it I’m going to toss mine too.

If you win, they should title it stream flow data collection.

I developed explosive food poisoning in the middle of a meeting with new colleagues TODAY.

I am what I call a sympathetic vomiter, my toddler son threw up in my kitchen and my husband and I played rock paper scissors as to who had to clean it up and I lost. I tried I really did but while cleaning it up I threw up on top of it. my husband’s response “well thats a good way of getting out of it”

Screw it, I’m not even gonna make a burner for this. I have no shame. Also I have more stories for this particular pissing contest because my line of work lends itself to it but I’ll stick to this one.

I don’t think I could parent because puke makes me retch or even puke. I dry heave when my dogs vomit and I have to clean it up. UGH.

Oh omg this just reminded me so vividly of my own similar experience: I was in college, watching a movie with this guy I was sort of seeing. Not a lot of comfort between us, yet, is what I mean. Still in the hiding our farts phase. But I really liked him. He lived in an old house with a bunch of housemates but they…

I have no memory of this, my mother told the story at my grandfather’s wake to our assembled relatives as a ‘remember the time Tammster...’ story. Anyhow, apparently as a small child - toddler small - she used to take me a playgroup. There was an older child, although still smallish, who would regularly just walk up…

Awww my parents were like this with my delinquent teenage friends! My dad gave one of my heavily drunk friends a ride home once when he found her stumbling around town and she curled up in the side lawn instead of going inside but it’s a safe neighborhood so he just let it be.

Oh man... I pooped myself in a mall I’d never gone to in Miami. My kid decided she wanted to check out Claire’s and while we were in there I felt *something* coming, but I sensed that I couldn’t hold it in. Ever tried to find a restroom in a giant mall you’ve never been to while shitting yourself? It’s a special kind…

I never thought I’d be this happy to be without an entry for Pissing Contest.

I CAN’T IT WILL DOXX ME AND IT HURTS

Same for Desperately Seeking Susan.

You gonna have to take that back because otherwise you’re insinuating A League of Their Own was bad and I will have to murder you.

Lol if your issues with Gags are her pants you are going to be sorely disappointed.

This is why comparisons between Lady Gaga and Madonna are unfair.

My former friend Cindy (and she’s former because of what you’re about to read) planned her whole life around getting married. That was her raisin d’être. 😁