It’s so appropriate that the de facto leader of the so-called “anti-PC movement” is someone who absolutely cannot take a fucking joke.

“...you can’t support the troops and be for national health care; that’s illegal in this country.”

Seriously at this point how the fuck is this real life. It’s too much to absorb. Like my new reality has shifted too quickly and I can’t fucking handle it. If I had the money I seriously would just go and herd cows at this point. The world has gone fucking mad.

What’s wrong with Firework?! That’s one of my go-to Karaoke songs!!! (and yes, I’m a dude. What of it?!)

We are all gonna die :(

Why is anyone surprised to encounter a turd in the toilet?

Ben Carson is a yawn made sentient.

Eternal gif is eternal:

All I care about is seeing what kind of sexy, low-cut gown the First Lady Daughter will be wearing.

As you know I don’t even know where things are in Texas so I got nothin to lose except more parts of the country I don’t understand

If by living he means stumbling around in stained sweats with circles under my eyes from lack of sleep, while my kidless friends go on a girl’s weekend to Vegas, then absolutely!

Jude is right. I’m not living. I am not even human. I am a spirit who only briefly takes corporeal form to post Harry Styles gifs on Jezebel. Here’s the secret: it may not be living, but it’s wonderful.

You are so dumb.

Aye. That’s one slimy fuckstick.

No matter what kind of shit Trump gets up to, keep one eye on Paul Ryan.

Indio is pretty much the worst, truth. But the desert itself...gorgeous.

I’d rather go to Coachella. If I’m going to be surrounded by hipsters and pubic lice, at least let me see Beyonce.

With no water at all, so they steal from the areas that do.

“This is my belief: there are two viable beings involved,” he said. “One had a choice early on to make a decision to conceive or not.