YASSS I received tickets for Valentine’s day! I may have the most amazing boyfriend ever.

I’m going on the 27th!!!

Domhnall Gleeson and Carrie Fisher were two of my faves, they look like they would be a blast to hang out with.

I would 10/10 tune in for NomNom Plays Armchair Psychologist.

I’m sure it’s lined with silk and unicorn hairs. But with my chub rub I’d leave little trails of glitter everywhere I go...

WOW NOW I REALLY WANT THEM.

Besides. without the pants, the jacket is just tacky.

sorry

I mean really.

“But a source notes there’s ‘concern’ that 27-year-old Blac Chyna is ‘preying’ on him ‘during a week time.’”

Klearly Kukookachoo is the korrect choice

Thaaaaaats what they are called. Under-boob-waist dresses just doesn’t have the same cachet...

What’s incredibly depressing is that despite the fact that he appears to have a pretty brutal addiction eating at him, Fallon is still getting a thousand more things done than my sorry stupid sober ass.

If drinking was football, Scotland would be Spain. And Spain would be Scotland.

I’ll spend 90 bucks on a lipstick when it can give me a 15 minute orgasm every time I put it on.

Link only because huge picture:

I want to wear a black version of the pink feathery one while I mourn Kitchenette and Millihelen. :(

Folding Kitchenette is the 3rd dumbest thing Gawker has ever done.

i just never thought their relationship would work, i mean what with him always shooting first.

I have been instructed to report back, so you’ll all be hearing from me.

Dude, half-assedly do Weight Watchers and do Zumba... more to dance around like a fool and de-stress than anything else, if you want a human approach to it. Or don’t. Or just eat the fucking muffin. Yes, you ideally “only get married once”, but I counter-argue that you’re not going to be on your deathbed like, “I’m SO…