This deserves more stars.

That is so very good. +1

God, this is the COTY. Just subtle enough to get the “HOT TAEK” guys in a lather! Beautifully done, all the stars are yours!

me too, let me just hit the reply button, type something real quick like, proofread it and then close my browser...righto!

Took a while, but you got there. have a +1

Bu what if you have to return some videotapes first?

I wanna star this so bad, but you’re at 69 stars, why would I ruin that?

Kenny Lofton will always be the king.

That’s the stuff! I make a point of stopping when I’m (infrequently) there!

Have you ever had a “Sonoran Style Hot Dog”? It’s sublime. I’ll let Wikipedia tell you the rest:

This is pure garbage. Chicken Tenders? Classic? Chicken Tenders didn’t enter the mainstream lexicon of food stuff until 1983 when McDonalds introduced the McNuggett. Until then, the “tender” didn’t exist. I’ve never had, nor have my children ever had, a goddamned tender at the ballpark.

Yeah, but if you also run the sink and shower at the same time, nobody will hear you pooping and you’ll have the added benefit of steaming your clothes. (Who cares about wasting water, amiright?)

And with a couple kids, that’s still a lot of laundry!

So, you’re basically a monster. You would get out of a shower, ostensibly a clean person covered in clean water, and dry yourself off with a clean towel and then throw that towel into a pile to be washed with more clean water? You grew up with housekeepers? Maybe you lived in the Ritz?

or how about this one great life-hack: when sitting in row 27 and boarding first, stow your big bag over row 5, that way you don’t have to carry it all the way to the back, and then all the way to the front when getting off! It also leaves room for you to stow your oversized purse and puffy jacket over your own row!

Oh, but with drugs, he was sensational....what’s your point, here?

What do you think it says under that first redaction?

Johnny Football never made it to senior year. He left college to enter the NFL draft as a Sophomore. Oh yeah, fuck him, too.

Best Kinja yet!

I read it in his voice, IN HIS VOICE, and now I can’t stop thinking about it. That’s beautiful!