The Cubs groundskeepers could have sure used the Invisible Hand of the Free Market to help them unroll that tarp.

Why would the multi-gazillionaire owner of a professional sports franchise want to pay a single dime for loyal employees' health insurance? Especially when laws requiring him to do so were passed under the Dictatorship of the Kenyan Muslim Socialist Commie Pothead who pals around with terrorist and golfs too much.…

You think they would have learned by now that it doesn't matter how many tarp failures you blame on Obama, he's still going to get reelected.

You know what I think? I think anyone who's never stood and stared suicide in the face should shut the fuck up. I think anyone who hasn't cried themselves to sleep and wake in the morning only to find fresh tears are already falling should sit the fuck down. I think anyone who doesn't understand what it's like to be…

"But I HAVE to be a dick, because mine is about this big!"

I don't think I've ever seen a woman in a niqab in my city that was a color other than black. We live in a subtropical climate. It's hot as fuck and humid and just miserable... I always wonder why they don't at least go with a light color. (There might be a valid reason, I just don't know what it is.)

No, you hate Google for that. Upworthy and Buzzfeed are just the ones who play Google's game really well. And jeeeeeeez. It's a puppy post. I thought it was a funny headline. Now I will go have a sad. :(

"You'll Never Guess What This Blogger Did When She Found Out A Commenter Didn't Like Her Headline!"

The length is also so wrong. Like, it should either hit the top of the shoes, or show the ankle, no? That is just a weird place for it to stop.

The risks of a VBA3C are exponentially higher than stated in this (incredibly irresponsible) post. I don't know of any OB who would go along with a vaginal birth after 3 C-sections, it is SO risky for both mom and baby.

"I used to own you, and I used to own you, and I am not quite sure I don't still own you" - my version of QEII's take on the Commonwealth games every year.

Why would anyone need to mentor Sam? He didn't break any laws or go to prison. Are you suggesting Dingy should be willing to help Sam pray the gay away?

And Hitler didn't touch a Jew.

THE GOSPEL ACCORDING TO ANTHONY OF TAMPA

In response, Dungy issued the following statement:

We have the homophobe representative, the free speech sentinel, and now the pouty conservative with the victim complex. Trifecta!

You must be enraged that college football is played on the Sabbath, then.

Hey, look! Ayn Rand has a Burner account!

Can I just share my serious brush with Ollivander greatness? I went to high school with (and remain friends with) the toy designer who designed all the wands sold in Ollivander's. My daughter got the hand-made mock-ups of ALL of them (the ones used to make the mass-produced ones) from my friend for her 11th birthday…

I'm a writer and have worked food service in several different roles, including server. (Also done a shitload of other jobs; got a lot of stories.) The WORST day writing is 100 times better than the BEST day serving. That's why I never tip less than 20% EVER. If the server slaps the food on the table and disappears…

Oh boy, you definately have a charming way to tell the internet you never get laid.