I… need a bIg doick to fit uP my la rge vagina

I know exactly what he's saying, and it's terrible.

If you're cheering people not having access to health care because you disagree with their values, you're a conservative.

I'm gonna turn you into my stepson, boy. Gonna make you mow my lawn. Gonna make you fetch me my afternoon Pepsi-Cola and iron my slacks. You are my stepson, and you love me.

The guy at the end with puffy buttholes for eyes is much worse than the arm-ripping.

Rallying means leaving the house, so 99% of them won't do it.

I feel lucky, there's been a president that I, a grossly obese man stuck in a bathtub, can identify with since 1909.

You could argue that three Skittles are much bigger than a single peppercorn. However, a single peppercorn ground could improve one's enjoyment of a given quantity of food to a degree greater than the degree to which the addition of three Skittles would. This is a very difficult question.

Because King was on heavy opiates when he wrote the book (this was after getting hit by a car). This made him loopy and preoccupied with shit troubles.

Listen pal, when you, me, and Kanye had our quarterly pizza party last week, I tried to talk to him about this stuff and you wouldn't back me up. You could have tried, but you were all "this is about the 'za, man, cut it out." This is on you.

I've had my problems with Obama's presidency, but I'll always be thankful that he personally murdered Antonin Scalia.

The "alt-right" is just Nazi filth who deserve nothing but pain and suffering. Never forget that, never give them an inch.

I'm blocked by lots of these people despite barely tweeting anything at all. One tweet to somebody saying I had joined the DSA, and several dozen retweets of Pitbull. They preemptively block people who follow leftists. It's pathetic.

Honestly I get it's not for everyone. It's pretty unpolished, and it's by far the most "problematic" thing I like (other than porn and some music, of course). But Nick Mullen is just a comedy beast.

Everyone's too busy jackin' to write about it.

I wouldn't say that makes you an asshole. The people you're describing are conflating a sexual fetish with a sexual orientation, and that's ridiculous.

I think the Dollop belongs alongside these two.

Listen to Cum Town.

My second favorite thing about Twitter is how when a famous person asks what podcasts they should listen to, dozens of people say to listen to Chapo. My favorite thing is when a famous person says they listen to Chapo, and dozens of people say to listen to Cum Town.

That's all extremely tenuous, based on a few lower court rulings and administrative rules that are subject to change by the next administration. It's not good enough. Not to mention the high bar that having to litigate in federal court poses to people who don't live near a district court. And I genuinely don't get why…