Let’s just talk logistics: there is zero way a teenager with a box of Nice & Easy dye could go from blue to blonde, especially with fresh blue dye. Zero. Zip. Not happening. Anyone who has ever dyed their hair ever would know this.

This. I’m the black sheep of my family - everyone else is some degree of conservative Republican. There are a few who probably think they need to save me because they think I’m going to hell. I grew up believing what they believed, but started to evolve my own beliefs when I moved away and went to college. I imagine…

The same way that so many reasonable, empathetic liberals come from bigoted conservative families, probably. They found an ideological system that resonated with them and rejected their family’s input.

A male feminist walks into a bar

I just use the Cooter line from Walmart. I think their liner in RimJob is almost an exact dupe for Mars Van Vooter’s Liquid Canvass.

Sam Bee is the fucking best. Sorry I have nothing more insightful to add.

I think he is actually using this fake rubber hand! It’s the exact same color.

This is the only thing I want to talk about today. The Truck Fucking urge is starting to percolate into all facets of society. Have you ever had sex in a truck? Let me tell you, it’s one of the least sexy vehicle options. We all know it only ranks slightly higher than a mini-van.

Oh how I wish I could just go back to childhood for the next 4 years.

I’m never having kids.

I loved watching Trump tie himself into a Gordian knot trying to explain his stances on his tax returns, support for the Iraq war, and birtherism.

“Because she has probably been aborted,”