Well, I guess it all makes sense now.

If climate change were linked to obesity, hair loss, and male impotence we'd have carbon neutral civilizations within the decade.

actually, I'd say it's the people-who-lose-their-shit-when-they-see-a-woman-breastfeeding-in-public's fault. nothing creates an air of self-righteousness than a (real or imagined) persecution complex.

man, how do bra-less hippies have great boobs like that? Mine would be in my ears doing that pose without a bra.

NO LAURA PREPON. NO.

Lost all respect for Laura Prepon now that she's a looney.

gtfo. Some alcoholics confront their problems and sober up, but some never do. Get out now, and if he's sober some time in the future, maybe you can give him another chance. Don't sit around waiting for it, though.

Did you call Jr. "basically retarded"? dude. Get a filter.

I also find it hard to believe that anyone in psych would say that having a disabled child is "being screwed." That's such a terrible thing to say.

such a difference between Canada and the States. If you see someone here wearing a hammer of Thor around their neck, odds are better that they're Pagans rather than neo-nazis.

North Dakota's tryin REAL hard to overtake Florida for Worst State Ever Award, huh?

I translate that as some variation of : "I have an arty, alternative image to maintain, but I've just been alternating watching Runaway Bride and Sweet Home Alabama, the two best movies ever made, so it's probably best if I keep that information to myself".

Congrats to the Baldwins. Let's hope Alec won't call this one a "rude, thoughtless little pig".

Yes and then they turn the other cheek

I think as long as they stay in the "Missionary Position", they are doing the Lord's work.

Has this woman never seen a soap? You're supposed to show up AT your funeral. You don't always have to go in though, if you have amnesia you can just watch from the back. Or if you're a real bitch you can sit right up front buried under black veils and stuff.

Clearly I grew up sheltered with two awesome gradnmothers. The idea of "bitch grandma" is akin to "compassionate republican" to me.

I am reading this while eating a Deep'n'Delicious cake from the pan.

#realtalk

What bothers me about this is you'd never see a puff piece about a male celebrity that was primarily focused on what he ate — unless the story was specifically meant to be *about* what the guy ate, like if he was training for the Olympics or something. But somehow it's Important when it's a woman, sigh.