Whenever someone brings up the arm-flab dilemma, I put my arms up like a body builder, and tell them “whenever I feel bad about my arms, I remember what I named them. Paul.” Kiss the right arm “McCartney” kiss the left arm, “WINGS!” shake both arms furiously.

It makes people laugh so now I know they’re thinking about…

I love how she proudly points him out twice as “My husband”. Useful too, otherwise I would’ve assumed the fire rousted a hobo out from under the garage.

The collection also included shirts that say ‘Team Bride,’ ‘Mrs.’ and ‘Bride.’

You and I both know dead bodies rested on that furniture and it’s futile to believe otherwise.

So it’s hot as balls outside when my vagina overheats are you saying that it is hazardous to run 50/50 coolant through my vagina? Does this also apply in winter with anti- freeze? I’m in California so the anti freeze thing doesn’t always happen but it can get below freezing where I’m at in the state.

My husband and child could ignore me for hours but the minute I so much as look at my phone they suddenly need me to help them perform the most basic of functions.

The fact that the bear is blushing says it all.

We had a Juneteenth lunch today and it started off so somberly due to the SC mess.

I LOVE YOU, JOHN WATERS!!!!!!! 143637 JOHN WATERS!!!!!!!

You're a genius. Some engineer needs to start working on a way to make this happen immediately. We can call it the cunt pump.

I don’t want to make assumptions about what it is like to have a mastectomy. But I am imagining that if I had to have a mastectomy, even if I’ve come to terms with it and learned to accept my drastically changed body, seeing a bunch of attractive young women with their perfect breasts holding a coke can in my honor…

when that part of the male anatomy is aroused and there’s an erection, the brain flies out of that and we have to take that very seriously,

Extrintrinsic.

:( She’s wonderful. Not only funny, but she was heartbreaking on Sex and the City. I feel like I took her for granted because you’d see her everywhere, but she was never the star, she just did her job and she was perfect.

Oh - I got this won.

Vote: Your local public library
Why: Libraries typically charge far less (some are free!) than commercial services.

Before my wedding I read French Women Don’t Get Fat. On the whole, many of the suggestions in the book are good, but she recommends a weekend leek cleanse. So I made up the leeks and leak soup and convinced my husband to do it with me. I made it about 4 hours and ordered Jimmy John’s for lunch, and forgot to tell him…

Your mum sounds rad as hell. Please thank her for the work she and other women did to make things easier and fairer for my generation.

Let me tell you about what life is like as a fat sexworker. My job involves sharing photos of myself as a strong, sexy, sexual woman, in varying degrees of undress. It involves me setting a figure - a not inexpensive one, either - on what I feel access to my body is worth.

This, for a myriad of reasons, makes some men…

I think she meant Valerine Bertnernie.