It is an indisputable scientific fact that people who like mayo are stupid garbage monsters with defective palates.

I think people put the cheese on the burger while it’s still on the grill because it “looks sexier.” Fuck that. Placing the cheese on the burger as soon as you take it off the grill means more cheese to eat with your burger and less burnt cheese to scrape off the grill.

Take your lactose intolerance back to the fifties, bigot. It’s 2017 and we’re accepting of cheese on our burgers now.

Bravo. This something that has needed to be said for the longest time. There’s another cheese faux pas I can’t stand and I’m gonna get wrecked over it.

My God have mercy on your soul.

It has been widely reported that the distribution of free tickets has declined to a huge degree over the course of MLS’s history. I’m not going to look that up for you.

I just use the Cooter line from Walmart. I think their liner in RimJob is almost an exact dupe for Mars Van Vooter’s Liquid Canvass.

Dude saves his own life with a miraculous, one-in-a-billion grab of a railing. Meanwhile, I lost my balance when I put my pants on this morning, stumbled, and smacked my cheek on the doorknob, which will leave a bruise on my face for the next two weeks.

I prefer fans who don’t drop foul balls.

“College athletes shouldn’t be paid because they get a free education.”

In regards to playing professional football again, the Raven quoted

Johnson is no saint; he’s a defense lawyer.

Poor man’s George Clooney is still a pretty good face to have, so you’re right, he shouldn’t have an issue. I’d love to be a poor man’s JLO

Single payer, not-for-profit. NOW. That’s the only acceptable replacement.

Sarcasm aside, middle aged recently-separated, silver haired men are one of my key demos.

Single and able to meet men who are interesting and interested is great. Single and basically invisible to all men can get lonely.

When someone tells me they don’t know what Democrats stand for, I point to the Democratic women doing things like this. Practical policy and law making are key to democracy & human rights. It’s not pretty, but this is politics in action: slow, meticulous, and directed toward a solution.

“Typically starting around 8-12 miles”

Start reading io9, they all quit.

Fraternities and sororities are largely based on exclusion. As a sorority reject, I’m trying to define my opinion on more than just my own personal experiences, but there you have it. The “College House” system, on the other hand, is awesome. Like Rice University here in Houston, first year students are randomly…