Danny Smith should have his ball hairs ripped out 1 by 1.

Well at least that sweater can distract me from the FUCKING ABOMINATION that is the Washington Redskins

So now we get breaking news emails from deadspin? really? Whats next a ticker across the bottom?

@Back to Azian Zero: Yup. Although in this case "underage Asian girls" must be changed to "Felix Jones"

Woody Allen - whiteness = TO

At least these receivers are good at something since it ain't football....

@Sh!tShow: And it was dark out but they wore sunglasses anyway!

God help us if people start showing up here because of Olberman's show.

mmmmm yes yes, your tears sustain me TO

Hell froze over? But I didn't get laid last night....

If an NFL game is played but no one can watch it, did it really happen?

Steve Nash then proceeded to yell at kids to get off his lawn even though he was in the locker room. The other players pretended not to hear him....

Please do not warn the Facebookers about things like Fleshbot. They need to learn on their own...

Replace the soccer team name with the Dallas Cowboys and this would be the best story ever.

@THE MENTALIST!: And the banning comes in 3...2....1....

Dine and dash?

You know things have gone south in your life whenever your name is preceded by the phrase "frustrated utilityman, who was just traded to the O's."

Whatever, he's got like 30 vertebrate, he can do without one or two

Isn't it fun to watch your team self-destruct right in front of you?

He thought he would be safe since no one, you know, actually reads newspapers anymore