I’m glad you got lucky! I definitely did not, and the immense amount of straight-up abusive, horrible messages just got to be way too much, very quickly. I can’t imagine going back to that one.

Believe me, I wish. It’s definitely sexist, and I’m beyond tired of it. Like, I’m sorry that I don’t look super chipper and approachable whenever I’m not smiling? Like you say, most men don’t either, but they aren’t expected to.

Indeed it is! And I really wish it weren’t. Like, that should not be a tall order, y’know? I get tired of people implying, too, that having any standards at all is the same as being “too picky.”

I think I’m wary of paying any money to an app that, thus far, has been as wholly useless as Tinder, but I’ll file that info away just in case, thank you.

I don’t even want a relationship, so I figured that should make it way easier! For me, it just seems that the pretty uncontrollable, physical/chemical aspect of attraction doesn’t crop up often. I have no idea why, and I have a fairly high sex drive to go with it, so it’s kind of infuriating. Like you say, you can’t…

Just based on my own experience (and that of a few other lady friends here in LA), it’s that hardly anyone seems active on it (e.g. you can swipe yes on dozens, if not hundreds, of dudes, and only yield maybe... 2-3 matches? and you can’t message anyone you don’t match with, so), and then on the off chance you DO…

I’m an introvert, and not half of a couple. I can’t handle bars or clubs very well, so that’s a no.

Soul-sucking is exactly how OKC felt to me! In a relatively short time, too, like maybe only a few months of use? It was genuinely negatively affecting my mental health. Ugh. Do not miss it one bit.

Right? I wish I had checked that first, because my god, why even bother. (Thank you, though.)

Sexual attraction, which shouldn’t need to be explained, though apparently you need me to remind you, is extremely subjective. I can’t help who I’m attracted to any more than you or anyone else can. As I’ve said above, I’m not going to apologize for not wanting to fuck someone that I feel absolutely zero attraction…

(1) There is a far, far larger pool of reasonably attractive women (see: women who put in the baseline effort you’re describing here) in the world generally than there are men.

You come across like a whiny twelve-year-old boy. GL to you with that, too.

Any thanks directed at anyone throwing the c-word around is entirely sarcastic on my part.

It seems to vary wildly on the person, as far as I can tell — I mean, I essentially signed up for OKCupid and particularly Tinder with the idea in mind that they’re supposed to be for more easily fascilitating hook-ups. I’m not looking to seriously date or have a relationship with anyone. But considering how often…

Yeah, it does come across that way. Thanks a lot, though, for the completely unhelpful comment! (Judging from your comment history though, you’re kind of a dick. So yeah, thanks but no thanks.)

I... could have written basically this entire comment. I think this means we should be friends?

My issue there is, I don’t seem to meet men often enough that I consider attractive enough (I mean in the purely uncontrollable, biological/chemistry manner, but which is pretty necessary) to want to sleep with. And not for lack of trying! Hence feeling pretty doomed these days, honestly.

I’m in LA, so who knows, but all my lady friends have also complained about its uselessness, so at least with that one, it doesn’t appear to just be me.

Damn, do I wish your advice worked for me. But in my experience thus far, across several apps, Bumble is by FAR the most useless. To the point where I honestly cannot even imagine why anyone uses it.

He was extremely unhappy with Duchovny at the time, for leaving the show. Mulder’s jaw being literally wired shut by the end? Not an accident. (Gillian wanted out at the time, too, but her contract had her trapped for at least another year, due to negotiations from previous years.)