Has someone checked on Bobby Finger? He might need a sympathetic shoulder.

I just want what Britney wants.

Keep at it! Sometimes she runs, sometimes she hides, and sometimes she’s scared of you. But all she really wants is for you to hold her tight! Be with her DAY AND NIGHT.

Oh yes, he can flick my clitoris of discernment any day.

The Braavos Head Museum sure is a cheerful place.

I just exploded with jealousy. Leo IS NOT WORTHY.

You know when women look at pictures of beautiful models and think of how unfair it is that they’re beholden to such unrealistic standards?

As a man I’m starting to understand that feeling.

Thanks. At least “on” and “the” still mean what I think they do.

dear god please don’t tell me you meticulously print them out on acetate and layer them over one another over some csi light-table with angle markings and room-temperature listings denoting possibilities in growth discrepancies. because, uh, i’m running out of toner and my mom wants her basement back so i need…

So, we’re just not going to talk about that rose wall?

You've never done front-to-bike? You're missing out.

I would so love if The Game were making a George Eliot reference.

Made me think of this:

I don't watch snl anymore so I have not seen this Colin host fellow before but he is adorabbbbbble. I want to have sexuals with him too.

Remember, no matter how nuts you are for her, if she likes someone else, it’s irrelephant.

Overheard at the scene,

Why would anyone be embarrassed about this? This is the motherfucking dream.

To stand in the way of true love.

What the fuck did I just read?

I’d like to take a moment to thank Beyonce for getting the world interested in lobsters once again.