@Jerkwheat: As soon as 'My Small Boobs and I' is over.

@Le Kangourou de Kataroo: @myself: Your/you're: Also doing it wrong.

Botox: Your doing it wrong.

I love that it's right outside the Oval Office windows so everyone (well, everyone allowed in the Oval Office) can watch them playing.

@newyorkette: That's what I was thinking - maybe it's actually a really meaningful name that we're being super culturally insensitive over.

Dear Candy Spelling,

I don't care how pretty you are - incompetence is incompetence. Michelle Obama is gorgeous, but that doesn't stop me thinking that she's brilliant.

I love the weight gain from my birth control - it makes me super curvy and all of the sudden I have tits and ass! When I go off the pill (which I do between boyfriends), I go back to looking like a 12 year old boy.

I love perfume. I've taken to wearing one type as my "signature" perfume, just one spritz before I go out, and it smells heavenly. The boy loves it, and it kills him. The owner of the restaurant we ate at last night complimented me on it last night as well, which was nice.

For the record, women didn't federally have the right to vote when this was published.

about his eyebrow maintenance routine.

Am I the only one who didn't realize the Bare Naked Ladies were still around?

And this will make my flight in 4 hours this much more nerve-wracking.

Women aren't supposed to eat chocolate in front of their boyfriends? My boyfriend goes to the store around the corner at 9 o'clock at night to satisfy my Snicker cravings, and gets me a king size bar everytime. He LIKES my sweet tooth.

I call my (male) bosses "the boys"... does that make me reverse Laura Bennett judgey, since they're older than me and employ me?

Except you've posted this before?

I TALKED TO TMZ TODAY!!!!!! I work for a company that has an online process server directory, ServeNow.com, and they called us to see if we knew about the process server being hit.

All I can think of is Ashley A-Bomb who looks just like her but blonde and fake-titted from Rock of Love, who is bitchily hilarious.

@ellaesther: I'm actually not a dude, thanks.

Justin's balls, as he's obviously carrying her luggage/purchase/dry-cleaning.