“He’s back, back, back, back to the bathroom!”

Chris Berman is also a leaker, which is what he gets for eating six cans of Olestra Pringles.

Cops can’t do anything because they’re too busy dealing with the murder on the pitch.

Looks like the Liverpool PD needs to invest in some Crisco.

Here you go:

Her opponent later admitted that it was the longest he ever lasted with a girl.

There’s the old joke where a Pilot on an overseas commercial flight announces one of the plane’s four engines quit, but all is ok....they’ll just arrive at their final destination about 20 minutes later than scheduled.

He took something that many would be embarrassed to do. Owned it, made it his. Now they cheer him instead of making fun.

I think there’s a point where your numbers are so good that it doesn’t matter at all who you played against. Gretzky having more assists than Jagr has points is definitely way past that point.

Holy cow! He was really Russian through that airport!

Sure you remember the NHL without him... He went to the KHL and scored 145 points in three years. At the ripe old age of 36.

I know he plays for the Jets but Petty does not have to live like a refugee.

Trainers knew Petty was concussed when they asked him where Ryan Fitzpatrick went to college and he didn’t know the answer.

He’s wearing camouflage pants.

I think it was all the 1/8ths that did him in...course he’s probly buyin by the QP

You guys get to call yourselves Crohnies? Luckyyyy

So he was smoking the Crohnic?

To be fair, Fisher’s decision wasn’t personal. The Rams have a strict policy against allowing their running backs to go anywhere on the field.

You’d think they could at least choose a position and stick with it.