The coolest feature in my commuter car is the 650 horsepower supercharged 370-inch V8. That, air conditioning, and the bluetooth-to-FM dongle that lets me play my iPhone over the stock stereo are all I need.

So... a Jeep Wrangler?

Dre I ask what “Chilewich” is and why it makes a desirable floor-mat?

Be fair, now - there’s a whole lot of ignorant mixed in with all that dumb.

Caddy is the best, in that it is the least bad of a terrible trio.

My father’s 1976 Plymouth Arrow had 4 cylinders, 5 speeds, and my heart.

Yuuuup. 6-foot-6 and 285, and my wife laughed - LAUGHED - at the sight of me getting in and out.

I test-drove one and it was AWFUL to get in and out of.

All it needs is a blunt, orca-looking shark mouth painted on the sides of the hood.

I fear I might have punched her in the nose if she’d said that to me in those circumstances.

That’s a pretty sly dig at Joshua’s masculinity, there...

A five-foot bed is too short.

“Safe for their time,” in this instance, makes me think of trying to run a small business with a top-line Commodore 64 that was fast for its time.

Man, THAT reference brings back memories!

I’ll agree, but only if we pronounce it DICK-ick-ull.

Supporting murderous, oppressive tyrannical regimes is immoral - even if the support is limited to pretending that they are decent and deserve a chance to participate in polite society.

If the light fails the seatbelt turns to dental floss and the dashboard grows knives.

Astonishingly, ‘Kona’ sounds even more like ‘Kona’ which means ‘leeward’ in Hawaiian and ‘Robby’s a douchebag’ in brospeak.

That’s closer to a ‘perfect’ price than it is to a ‘stained seats and patchy paint’ price for a fundamentally cool car that I love love LOVED as a kid.

Yeah, it’s analogous to saying “I can either die in my forties of emphysema and cirrhosis, or I can die of old age when I’m old - either way, I’m DEAD!”