Snarky boilerplate contrarianism is the Perpetual Juice Cleanse.

Chuck C. Johnson is a cockroach.

I love throwing shit out but then I have regrets after the fact. It’s a vicious cycle.

Someone should offer them an antisepptic.

As a bisexual person, which bathroom should I use?

Bitrex is the bitterest substance in the world

Solo is a good name for someone who likes Ayn Rand

Obviously these people have never heard my inner monologue.

Could there be a worse decision in a redemption piece than to declare your kinship with renowned lunatic Ayn Rand?

We, the living, can only shrug at Solo’s bullshit.

Aw heck yeah! I call all my weird lust objects Buscemis.

It makes me wonder how Vince Vaughn would react if twenty or so heavily armed black men showed up to his next movie set. I bet that whole”defense against tyranny” thing would be abandoned in favor of “OMG! Gangsta thugs with guns! Call the police!”

Way to kill my lady boner for Swingers era you, Vince.

Vince, Vince, Vince.

They’re pretty much asking for the right to die on their feet.

DON’T SHOOT UNTIL YOU SEE THE WHITES OF THEIR DRONES

If Vaughn was really a libertarian he’d accept the free market’s verdict on whether people give a shit what the star of The Internship, The Watch and Delivery Man thinks.

It’s my birthday on Thursday, in case anyone was still trying to come up with gift ideas.

I'm a little concerned gabourey sidibe has never had her reflexes checked. What's up with that?

Some of them.