If only the poor guy could find a mortgage lender.

Florida Man, Florida Man, made himself a MAGA van.

Man, if only they’d started talking about voter fraud or the migrant caravan instead of their shitty football teams, they’d probably be the best of friends.

...Maybe. (This was Barry’s good idea.)

You are wrong, for more reasons than we have time or space here to even outline. Please go educate yourself.

So, Americans who served in the military “own” the flag more than the rest of us. Got it.

You don’t speak for all veterans. Veterans do not get to decide what the flag/anthem mean to the citizens of this country.

You can repeat yourself as often as you like, and you’ll still be wrong.

Biles isn’t happy

One night in a little saloon in Fort Stockton, Texas, I ripped a man’s leg off and beat another man to death with it. The West Texas desert ran red with blood that night, my friends, and it pooled underneath the I-10's overpass and I bathed as a grackle does in the puddled muddy water of the rolling thunderstorms…

Reminder: He is not irreplaceable.

There are some more people who ought to be strapped into chairs and beaten with hammers. People who wear visors.

Everybody’s trippin’

Hazing: gang initiation for rich white kids.

These details are upsetting. It’s hard to read about incidents taking place in college athletics that you’d usually associate with a Supreme Court nomination.  

Seriously.  Someone needs to sit down with the rest of the owners and teach them how to play Settlers of Catan.  You don’t trade sheep for wheat with the person who has 8 points showing and a 2:1 wheat port. 

If you’re single and don’t feel like buying tons of groceries, why not do Blue Apron/ meal kits to feed yourself.

How is it that men can honestly think telling a minor (a minor relative, at that) that he wants to have sex with her is nothing but an ego boost or mentoring or whatever garbage they manage to roll around in? 

Le’veon turned down a $70m over 5 years, that is a fucking monster deal, a lot of people act like the Steelers offered him peanuts.

In case I was confused about which side to take on this thing, I’m glad a Pouncey showed up to clarify that I should be supporting Bell unconditionally.