This is what happens when a bunch of old dudes want to get in a dick-measuring contest, but no one wants to actually drop their drawers and show off their dead flaccid wieners.

Grey and Blue knows how to throw a punch. Orange guy does some weird downward chop like he’s a silver screen damsel-in-distress fighting off the evil Count Rupert. Green Shirt throws haymakers and White shirt only knows how to wrestle and not very well. I think you’ve gotta score Notre Dame for the win on this one,…

“if we evolved from monkeys, why are there monkeys?”

Oh, dear God in heaven, when they start in on Wall Street. The Times will have include a sexual harrassment magazine with the Sunday edition. You’d have to be a New Yorker to realize how instantly despicable so many of those guys are. Their very existence is a form of harrassment, and that comes across when they’re…

It was at louis vuitton store next to their hotel. Don’t think you can haggle there :/

LiAngelo probably thought the shopkeepers would be just like LaVar and not pay any attention to him.

Ball’s not a bust yet, but his expectations should be commensurate with his draft position. Butt.

Breanna, thank you for putting this story out with Hepatitis B(ecky)‘s mugshot front and center. I’ve seen too many articles using the nasty bitch’s “cute” instapics and I’ve been calling out the authors. Fuck that noise.

Muffed punt always seemed like some kind of British slang to me...

This is the school that just created a required course for all students in Patriotism where all students have to learn how to parade march, map reading, rifle marksmanship, rope systems, knots, and rappelling; clearing your browser of the gay stuff, proper Nazi salute decorum, blaming others for your problems, and…

I was not referring to the players. When I said inmates, I meant the beer vendors, and when I said prison, I was talking about the rest rooms. What I was talking about, is how the beer vendors get everyone ready to pee, and then we end up with long lines at the restrooms. That whole “NFL league office” explanation was…

My MFA in Spoons cost me too much in time and effort to just throw away.

If I were a graduate of College of the Ozarks this is where I’d mail back my BSci in Advanced Squirrelin’ in disgust.

My guess: Melo’s wayward game-tying three attempt.

I’d say it was caused by Draymond Green, but I don’t think that’s where airplanes keep their testicles.

Not sure feathers would stick to object in 400mph+ winds.

He runs like a six year old who just saw a bee.

“We can’t have the inmates running the prison,” McNair said.

Really it’s gonna be me with just shoes, a jersey, a hat, and a bat.

I made the light wall from Stranger Things - It’s programmable so I can type any message into it.