It’s moving, but also terribly depressing. Justin Bieber is doing more good for Detroit Public Schools than the Republican- led government. Instead of 1) not fucking things up in the first place, or 2) fixing their own fuckups in a timely fashion, they have turned Michigan into a charity case.

When I delivered pizzas in college (in Michigan), it was either boom or bust in the snow. Either it was busy and you made a ton of money, or it was so slow we shut down early. So it was kind of a wash.

You called that one