lapatrona
La Patrona
lapatrona

I HATED shaving (time, weird contortionism, blood, pain, stubble an hour later, etc) and liked waxing except for the cost and the having to regrow it at exactly the time when for some reason or other you didn't want to… and then I got a Groupon for lasers and it was brilliant. I wish I'd done it a lot earlier.

I should confess I've never even read her book — I've just been told by lots of different people that I will love her then when I've read pieces she's written (or even just Twitter posts) I get a really strong unpleasant reaction, and I can't put my finger on exactly what she's saying that's so off-putting to me. The

God, I feel totally unimaginative now for never trying anything fun like that.

You are brilliant.

Is that why I find her annoying? I can never remember, I just know that I do.

My mum thinks I'm either a) a brave and pioneering young lady, or b) a bolshie and uppity madam with ideas above my station — it depends on the day — because I'm so very unlike her, and much as I love her I would really, really hate for that to change.

I swing between being extremely distressed by my face and totally fascinated. It's horrifying/brilliant how everything changes.

Oh yes! I actually really like all those places you mentioned a lot… I'd happily live in any of those cities. I was actually planning to move to Seattle or Portland originally but then I ended up getting a job in LA instead. (The maternity leave and health-care costs would probably still have to change for me to move

Yeah, the US is definitely really affordable for a lot of things — I was there for eight years, and the cost general stuff I needed in my 20–28-year-old life was a lot lower than it would've been in London, which I miss now (trying to find a flat I can afford here in London is KILLING ME). But now that I'm older and

"Prom or Bust" is brilliant.

I'm English but spent a million years in the US, and now I'm home in London with an American husband. In theory, we have the option to live in the US or the UK or EU countries, but moving is hard and expensive so we kind of have to choose a place and stick with it for a while… and right now we've picked the UK because

Vodka-filled chocolates and an incredible-sounding and -looking language that I would have even less chance of being able to speak if I first ate all the vodka-filled chocolates! I love Finland!

Sorry for this probably dumb question: is it worth it for ten outdoor minutes on a non-sunny day? (And is 30 too late to save myself?)

The only thing I'm taking from this entire threat is "all the rum". V good.

Our trains don't have assigned seating… the quiet carriage is at the end, closest to the station entrances, so they get packed with the laziest people who can't be bothered to walk to a non-quiet carriage.

I will definitely proof the tattoo designs of my progeny.

I just sat down in the quiet carriage and there are THREE people talking on there phones and one who is TEXTING WITH THE SOUNDS ON. Ooh, one is giving her phone number… should I text her and tell her to fucking shut the fucking fuck up? OH AND NOW THE MAN BESIDE ME IS CALLING SOMEONE! His name is Marcus, he's

Some of my friends and I have recently realised the brilliance of Mum Things, ie things our mums say. Now we're all saying things like "flipping heck!" even in seriously enraged moment (other favourite Mum Things include "for the love of God!", "give it a rest!", "for Pete's sake!", "leave it out", and "put a sock in

The number of people who take their children INTO THE QUIET CARRIAGE ON THE TRAIN makes me want to start screaming obscenities.

I'd much rather my kid swear correctly than use terrible grammar.