It's HILARIOUS when someone's American grandma – or a cutesy little American kid – says "fanny" and thinks they're being all sweet.

That is truly glorious.

I'd never pined for a wedding or anything, but I couldn't live with my bloke unless we got married (he's an exotic foreign type), and in the end I actually really liked the whole thing, event planning and name changing and all. I enjoyed the wedding like I enjoyed my lovely friends' lovely weddings (except more) and I…

I can barely remember any French or Russian and haven't tried to use either for years, but GOD they come back whenever I try to remember a word in Spanish (which I'm currently studying). It's like my brain can only cope with two languages: English and Foreignthings.

I hadn't thought of it like that; I like it.

Me neither. I'm much faster in joined-up (plus it looks pretty and makes me happier).

I get compliments on mine, too. I spent years practising – in my first year at uni I used to spend hours sitting in the library copying random passages from random books for fun because I hated my flatmates and writing beautifully calmed me down. Then I learnt Russian and every Russian I ever met had insanely gorgeous…

Is "presidente" for a woman now totally old fashioned? I learnt it as unisex but that was a million years ago. Does it depend on the country at all? (I'm Googling but can't see a clear answer.)