I dreamt that my (at the time) three-year-old niece was hugely, horrifyingly pregnant. She started to scream as she went into labor, and I woke up to discover that I had started masturbating in my sleep.

Yes, though I would record it and put it online. Then I would harass Ryan’s wife and children at their home by screaming from the sidewalk outside their home, “WHAT’S IT LIKE TO HAVE A FILTHY FUCKING SLUT IN YOUR FAMILY!?”

Since Kara Brown thinks the Columbine shootings were so fucking hilarious that she cracked jokes about them in a piece about drinking milk, when should we expect her to start delivering belly laughs about these dead people, and in what context?

I had never seen Botched before. Does it actually require that everyone involved be an insane asshole, or is that just luck?

A family friend - someone I knew growing up, whose mother was my first babysitter - got arrested for child pornography a few years ago. I had nothing but a terrible sadness for his entire family and myself.

The whole thing is so damned weird.

This is an honest speculation:

While I am staunchly against the death penalty, I will be tickled to watch pro-lifers who support it go through their mental gymnastics in this instance.

So . . . what’s the over/under for likelihood of Actual Angry Black Guy vs. White Guy Trying to Avoid Exam?

I was thinking, “Maybe someone who can’t remember violent altercations shouldn’t be in public office,” and then I realized we’re talking about Louisiana, where this is one of the less fucked-up things that could be wrong with a politician.

The tenets of Catholicism are incompatible with human rights and dignity.

That is absolutely not an accusation of rape, Lux never calls it such, and to say otherwise is misleading at best, a shitty lie at worst.

Given what I’ve seen from the previews, maybe actors of color were simply smart enough to stay the fuck away from what looks like a CGI trainwreck..

Oh, but you don’t need to let it end on that kind of depressing note.

Are you kidding? It’s a Waffle House.

I hope the last thought that went through her head was, “This wouldn’t be happening if I wasn’t a stupid piece of shit.”

Yeah, if the money were, say, directed towrds some sort of diversity training or forcibly reinvested into STEM programs at the school, I could get behind it.

I am genuinely undecided as to whether it’s more evil for Hasselbeck to continue to misinform America via F&F, or to devote herself full-time to creating children who think and act like her.

Oh god, when I had a student whose first name was “Anil,” I was so freaked out over screwing it up on the first day of class I was practically hyperventilating.

I think it’s important to remember that putting on a performance of Rent in this setting means that you have teenagers playing heroin addicts who have acquired HIV/AIDS by sharing needles.