Calling it now: this is so they can have a sexy lady mummy, and it will be an absolute ripoff of Haggard's SHE, without any of that book's marginally-redeeming qualities.

Have you read the Editing Room's take on the Fast & Furious series? They start commenting on the point when this happens, when the movies just decide that Vin Diesel is a cartoon character who can walk away from things just like Wile. E. Coyote, incredulously, in meta throughout, and it is HILARIOUS.

What's th'at, y'ou sa'y?

See, this is why I can't tell if these are real headlines in the sidebar, or Onion-Onion items. "Another Gritty Reboot, Robin Hood: Origins!" "Mila Kunis as a Sexy Superhero Detective! Also Reese Witherspoon Has Learned Nothing From Hot Pursuit" "Wes Anderson To Make Another Stop-Motion Animal Movie About Dogs (Mila…

Specifically, the Happy Cocaine. That's what makes people think projects like Pan or Robin Hood: Origins or F4rtastic or Lone Ranger or a whitewashed Ghost in the Shell and Akira are good ideas. (But they're going to run out of both the Happy Cocaine AND the post-flop Sad Cocaine at this rate…)

Every blog sets its own custom word filters for Disqus, I think.

Well, it makes it easier for us to distinguish between original and adaptation when criticizing it, so I'm in favour of this, I think. See also The Last Airbender vs ATLA. Since we can be pretty sure that it's going to suck and we'll need to distinguish when we complain about it, and this avoids the need for clunky…

Space-age ceramics. Won't work. Need to nuke it from orbit to be sure.

Kill it with fire/Nuke it from orbit?

"A Feegle claymore was so sharp that a human might not know his legs had been cut off until he tried to walk. The guards themselves suddenly had the look of men who knew they were supposed to be big and strong but were now faced with the realization that “big” or “strong” wouldn’t be nearly enough. They’d heard the…

He's a white dude, he gets pretty much infinite passes until he has a flop that cost over 50 million (and even then, he may get a pity pass, Akiva Goldsman is still getting work…)

"Rolllll out the barrelllll…."

The Boy was his sled.

Short for Gadzooks!

Which is the stupidest thing ever — why would you hire an art-film director who made a quirky, character-driven monster movie full of classical mythology allusions, in which the most horrible thing is watching a poor old man fall apart in the throes of addiction, and where a young child with PTSD is the pure-hearted…

More restraint, too — Shymalan goes for broad strokes and bathos, ever since Signs, and Nolan still has that British coolness which passes for depth in many American circles.

But you don't like "more colour, less exposition" when you get it. Maybe movies just aren't your thing?

That cynicism is why Joe Wright's Pan is failing, why F4rtastic failed, why Seventh Son failed, why Lone Ranger and Last Airbender failed, and the studios Still. Don't. Get. It. IDK how many flops they're going to have to suffer, to realize that "Oh, just throw anything at the screen, they're just kids/fanboys, they…

The evocation of ancient Assyria as imagined by turn-of-the-century fantasy and history artists, the recreation of Maxfield Parrish's fairy tale costumes, and the shoutout to Lord Dunsany, also made me swoon; but the part that had me in stitches was Liz treating the old Irish goblin like a stereotypical primitive…

The Marvel connection — the Weinsteins also screwed over Kenneth Branagh, who did a short sf film that was supposed to be released with Mimic as part of an anthology, before they decided to make Mimic a full-length feature, before butchering it… And then Branagh did a cop show for British television and cast relative…