WarnerTV is getting all the scoops this week.

The Trade Joe’s near my parents house had this incredibly fast bagger. Amazingly, she only had one arm but she was twice as fast any of the other checkout clerks. I always tried to get in her line.

Line speed is dependent on some kind of voodoo that I will never master. No matter which line I choose, no matter which criteria I use to choose it, I am invariably in the slowest line. A good strategy for everyone else would be to follow me and pick a different line.

I also look at the cashier. If you can spy an obviously efficient cashier (and bonus efficient baggerbagger), you win.

The only people who ever seem to think its a sport are the assholes like you who constantly like to point it out.

Gronk and Beastmode

This needs to be a sitcom, or a reality show. Just have these two live together and be themselves. That was unexpectedly, extremely, funny.

Don't feed the trolls dude. They're just trying to rile you up cause they think it's funny. It's pretty fucked up but welcome to the internet.

A quick a dab to the pulse-points will suffice when applying most malternative beverages.

You don't like MLS. We get it.