1. Don’t have kids. There’s virtually no upside to having them. Plus they cost a lot.

C’mon Kobe. Pass the ball, take better shots...and don't be a rapist.

Oh no! What are the chances that every single player and their coach will whine on incessantly about this!?! I bet it's fairly high...

I like oatmeal cookies because they’re made of oatmeal. I like peanut butter cookies because they’re made of peanut butter. But I feel like calling them Girl Scout cookies is not only misleading... but disappointing.

Dad?!? Is that you...

Brilliant!